I woke up at 4:30AM this morning, and went for a run in the dark and empty streets of Kuala Lumpur.
It's peaceful. I walked at the end of my run, and I could see delivery trucks getting set up to start the day. On my way back to the little place I'm staying, I picked up a coffee and some water. The first light of day was breaking over the city, and men were loading large stacks of newspapers onto the back of trucks.
14 hours later, I'm starting to get tired, even though it's only the early evening. Some part of me wants to sleep, but I'm in a highly creative state right now. Right now, I'm making all sorts of connections and I'm seeing things really clearly.
I just did an exceptionally good half-hour of work. I solved about five hours worth of bang-head-against-wall type problems with some efficient, elegant work. It flowed smoothly and naturally.
I'm tired. I want to sleep.
But I'm scared to sleep. I'm exhausted, but I'm also operating at peak creativity right now. I feel effective and like I can do just about anything elegantly, efficiently, effectively, smoothly, pleasantly right now.
If I had greater control over myself, I'd schedule it so that I wake up feeling exactly like this. But since I don't have that level of control over my emotions and creativity, I'm just going to run this out until the creativity wanes, or I pass out from exhaustion. This is too good to pass up.
What a shame. I'll be a different Sebastian when I wake up, and I really, really like this Sebastian. I wish I could be him more often. No sleep for now. Sometime I need to study how to control my emotions more. I wonder if it's possible, with practice, to achieve peak states at will?
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