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Internal Scorecard #12: Once More Into The Breach

"Once more unto the breach, dear friends, once more; Or close the wall up with our English dead. In peace there's nothing so becomes a man As modest stillness and humility: But when the blast of war blows in our ears, Then imitate the action of the tiger"

-- Shakespeare, Henry V


I write these Internal Scorecards up, usually weekly, so that you can see the pragmatic applications of strategy, habits, operations, production, etc. The good and bad, the upsides and downs, and so on. I get a lot out of it too -- it gives me and external accountability mechanism, and good feedback.

This one covers 11 August to 17 August.

May 7: Flavorless Challenge

On Leo Habits

Read about my challenge here.

Today was another tough day ... I'm actually fine eating the bland food (cold boiled potatoes aren't that bad), but I find my mouth and mind both really craving some kind of flavor. Anything. I want to eat fruit, or drink Eva's coffee with creamer, or drink some wine during the day, just for some taste.

It's interesting to watch my mind try to find ways to weasel its way to getting what it wants. It justifies it in so many ways, just a little cheat, no one will know. And maybe I'll give in from time to time, but for now I'm just watching the process. My mind is really inventive when it wants to be.

The amazing thing is watching myself go to the foods without thinking -- I just reach for it, or imagine myself drinking the coffee as if it's really happening -- and at this point I haven't even thought about my flavorless challenge. The thought hasn't occurred that I'm not supposed to eat or drink the food, but I just am used to being able to eat whatever I feel like eating. It's like being able to order whatever you want online, whenever you have the urge. It results in spending a lot of money and having a lot of debt and clutter.

Update: I cracked! After doing great all day, eating according to plan and not giving in to temptations, Eva and the kids left for Sacramento, leaving me alone ... and late in the evening I gave in and ate some raisins and salted peanuts. Not horrible, but it was interesting to see my resolve just crumble. I think it was a combination of being alone (when the family leaves, I feel like a bachelor), having several hard days, being tired, and perhaps not having enough salt in my diet.

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