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In Praise of Mistakes and Embarrassment

I don't like making mistakes. In fact, I think I dislike it more than most people.

Yet, in any discipline that includes new and novel and pioneering things, mistakes must be made. This is not a good thing, per se. But it's not a bad thing either. It's just a thing.

Mistakes happen.

Embarrassment is something else entirely. The vast majority of mistakes won't be noticed by anyone else, but embarrassment is when you do something that you don't like how it reflects on you to other people.

While most mistakes can be fixed and then mostly shrugged off, I think embarrassment cuts people much deeper. In fact, I've heard plenty of anecdotes of a person getting embarrassed the first time they tried to do something, and then not trying again for a few years. Or quitting entirely, even.

Open Letter

On betternotstop

Tonight's my last night in Manchester before I head back to my Mum's for a week and then off to KL. After my flatmates Birthday party last night (which involved discovering the coffee table can stand the weight of three adults dancing) I am feeling decidedly delicate. The gorgeous girls from downstairs are making some dinner and then we are all heading out. Can't wait for it but still haven't packed or finished half the work I was supposed too, oh well priorities, priorities!

In an effort to feel I have achieved something today (I don't think eating three pasties in one sitting counts) I am planning to go snap happy tonight to brighten up my blog with some pictures of my actual life rather then spending twenty minutes on google images trying to find something I like the look of.

It's been a rollercoaster week, lots of going out and saying goodbye to old friends. I even managed to fit in a trip to the Seaside (again no pictures) to see some friends from Uni. One thing it has reinforced is making sure that I look after some of the amazing people I have meet along the way. Those who know me know I am 'hook, line and sinker' about most things and pretty impulsive as well. Along with my many bad qualities (snoring, loud voice, scattyness) I always try and counteract this by making sure that I never do anything to hurt other people. I have not been an angel in the past but I can not abide people who unneccesarily pratronise other people. Its a easy to do thing, and a throwaway comment can really affect someone. Good comments are great though. I still remember someone telling me I had 'nice eyebrows' (not the best compliment ever but one nonetheless.) Unfortunately I also remember being told I would never amount to anything (an old boss who was very successful in the career I wanted to pursue) and that I was just 'one of those girls that is only ever a mate'. I imagine if this is relayed to the people that told me these things that the probably can't even remember saying it, maybe the might even apologise, or explain that actually they were telling my I had 'nice know how'.

I suppose this post has turned into an open letter to anyone I may have upset with a throwaway comment deliberate or otherwise. I'm devious but not dishonest. However I only ever give compliments when they are due - and I have taken the time in the last few years to make sure I do - they mean so much more and it makes me feel good knowing that something I have said may stick with you.

It's affected my twitter feed as well - I'm trying to cut down on to much uncessary crap, 'OMG hungover.com' , 'watching Xfactor with a cup of tea and choccies, bliss'.... you know the score. And anyway Jesus had 12 followers, I have more.

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