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How to Connect Past Smalltalk

Awesome email here -

Hi Sebastian!

One of the 900 here -- and this is my FIRST time ever emailing a Blog. I was a little hesitant to write this actually, in part because I so enjoy your blog that I almost didn't want to "burst the bubble". But after reading a lot of posts and already having spent quite a bit of time previously ( and constantly ) in introspection, I would really appreciate your input on a major stumbling block....

Connecting.

My short question is: How do you connect with someone? And, secondly, based on your preference of doing away with pleasantries / small talk, how do you connect with someone without the seemingly required "pleasantry" stage of a conversation?

So it took this long

On Shut Up and Take My Hand

but finally I'm getting somewhere with my stupid therapist. Now don't get me wrong I still abhor her and I don't see it as helping me with my depression at all but hey at least I can say that to some extent these sessions are becoming more liveable.

I hate going to the sessions for two (or more) reasons. I hate talking about my emotions. Especially to someone I don't like and don't trust. And I hate the fact that its so *open* - as in, if she things its of importance, she can tell my parents or school or whatever. And ok *insert legal shit here* but eeeh. Its uncomfortable for me.

Anyways, after todays session and months and months of other sessions, it finally feels like we're getting somewhere in our doctor-patient relationship. She's finally caught on to the fact I don't like and don't trust her (slow much?) and after a conversation today, she's now "taking steps" to improving the way I view her. Which wont happen. But still.

In all honesty, I don't actually see much point in this therapy thing, other than it gets people off my back. Like my parents and the teachers at school, I guess its just a price to pay to get them to shut up for a few minutes. Only a few minutes though.

So these past few sessions, instead of just talking about depression and emotions and shit, we've started talking about random things I like. For example drawing. I showed her a few of my drawings and we talked about that for a bit and anime as well. Which wasn't all too bad, but me being paranoid and guarded, I couldn't help but be constantly thinking "so what's all this for then?"

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