The light is low in the bar/cafe, opera music is playing, and I write with a single candle on the table providing most of the light.
The owner is a very internationally inclined Chinese man. Impeccably dressed in Italian clothing, he slowly works the room, offering for people to try...something, I can’t see exactly because it’s too dark. Candy? Chocolate? Olives? Something.
He and I have chatted before, but he sees that I’m working and leaves me to my writing and coffee. The coffee is pretty good. I’d prefer if it was slightly stronger, but it’s still pretty good.
I stayed up all night talking business with a Chinese friend, then had a call back to America scheduled at 5AM local time. I didn't sleep until 9AM, and then I awoke at 5PM when I got a dinner invitation.
Well, dinner for my host, breakfast for me.
He wanted my take on something that's been on his mind, I gave it. We talked history and politics a little bit, and then he invited me to an event on Sunday. Coffee hadn't kicked in yet, so I was still hazy. How's my calendar on Sunday? I think it's clear. "Yeah, I'm in, thanks."
I come back from breakfast/dinner, work a little bit, go running. A pretty hard run and it's pretty cold out. Did some stairs too.
Get a massage.
Order a chicken burrito and coffee at the bar/cafe where I'm now writing by candlelight. Coffee's pretty good. Could be slightly stronger, but pretty good.
I'm still hungry. How many calories have I had today? ...1700, I think?
I'm hungry, but no ordering. Still cutting. I want to look like a barbarian warlord. It'll help me do the things I want to achieve.
It'll be time for a bulking cycle soon, rebuild my muscles, get stronger. But I'll cut some more first. When I start lifting and bulking, my testosterone and aggressiveness are going to go up. Right now I don't need and wouldn't benefit from higher levels of aggression, and later I will benefit from it. So, still cutting. Bulk later.
I'm hungry. No matter. I'm going to look like a barbarian warlord. That's better than food.
I try to burn simple phrases into my brain that contain the whole gestalt of something I'm going to do. It makes it easier to avoid short term temptation.
Health benefits are such a hazy and ill-defined thing. "I'm going to look like a barbarian warlord" - that contains the whole idea. That's better than food.
"Another coffee, please. Xiexie."
This coffee's weaker than the last one. Fuck, why is it so hard to get a strong coffee around here?
It's still not so bad. Good oil on top of it, prepared well. Hmm... I don't know what makes coffee strong. I should find out. Or maybe I can ask them to make it stronger for me. Hmm, hmm, hmm.
No food. Cutting. Barbarian warlord. Will eat asinine amounts of calories when I'm bulking. That'll be fun. I don't need the aggression boost right now, I'm not doing anything particular adverserial or controversial or fear-inducing that defiant mannerism and aggression would benefit. Keep cutting.
No more food. Barbarian warlord. Gestalt. Keep building.
"Abandon All Hope, Ye Who Enter Here." -- Inscription on the Gates of Hell, Dante Alighieri's "Inferno"
The worthy detour? I think I've got a formula for "High Creative Mode"... just it's not particularly consistently effective yet, and it's playing a pretty high stakes game. On Day Seventeen, I made my first crack at applying it, and had an incredible day. I wrote a 5000-word piece, that after editing and getting the ending right, I think could be amazingly fantastic. Just writing it was a joy.
Following from that, I was walking on air for the rest of the day.
In Day Eighteen, I attempted the same thing, and fell short. This was maddening, and the whole day was aggravating. I think I've got a rough formula for High Creative Mode, but it doesn't produce 100% results. And when it fails, it's pretty ugly, at least so far.
I kept detailed notes on both days, much more fleshed out than usual. There's more stream-of-consciousness. They're... honestly, a little weird. You can evaluate for yourself:
Here are the Twitter updates from the 72 hour period (and a little before). In a few days, I'll post up my reflections on what I learned, and plans for the future.
I'm anxious about fasting for 72 hours. I have 4 hours and 57 more minutes of foodtime left, and then nothing until Saturday. 7:03 PM Oct 28th
Just set up my phone. I will be constantly updating this twitter with how i feel during my 72 hour fast. Visit www.zaccohn.com to find more. 7:17 PM Oct 28th
is hungry and tired already... and he hasn't even begun his fast yet! This is going to suck. 9:30 PM Oct 28th
I'm home for the night. It's timeto pee, then start making the last supper. One hour and five minutes. 10:55 PM Oct 28th