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The Rare Occasion That Passive Aggression is Called For

It's like I'm not in a cafe any more, but rather receiving a diplomatic corps from a nation I'm at war with. The woman has a "stern and serious fucking business" look on her face, and another waitress is standing alongside her right flank with arms crossed.

I shake my head and try to wave them off, doing the universal "I'm on the phone" gesture, holding up a thumb and pinky finger.

She starts speaking anyways. She's loud and insistent.

"Hold on, Marcus."

I take my headset off. "Yes?"

Make and Own Your Decisions

On Chaotically Ordering

Indecision is one of the worst qualities in a lot of people; I include myself among them. The insidious little voice that whispers "you don't have to decide now, decide later" is all too easy to listen to, and it is highly destructive. You miss opportunities, have to rush for deadlines, people start to see you as flaky and unreliable, the entire thing is abhorrent.

Making decisions is important. Even if it's something completely arbitrary, such as where you're going to meet your buddy for a drink, not deciding is just giving the other person a responsibility they don't want and generally wasting time. just make the call, and if the other person doesn't like your (arbitrary) decision, changing it will mean absolutely nothing to you because you didn't care in the first place.

For the more important decisions, the urge to put them off is strong. You know you can't delegate this one, so you just think "I'll make it tomorrow"; "I'm tired from work, I'll do it at the weekend"; "I don't want to waste my weekend on this, I'll do it next week": repeat ad infinitum.

Just do it. Sit down, make a list of pros and cons, and make the decision. The decisions in life that bring us the most are never easy, but they still need to be taken. Pick a side, option, path, and move on.

The flip side to this is owning your decisions. This doesn't apply to the arbitrary ones, but for decisions that matter to you this is important. Once your decision is made, you need to run with it all the way. You made that decision. You weighed it up, picked the best possible outcome, and took the stand. Letting someone else dissuade you, unless the reason is something mind-blowingly exceptional, is a disservice to you. It means you have so little respect for yourself that you think you can't be trusted to make decisions.

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